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Home > Polyamory
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Adult Alternative Lifestyle: Dating and Relationships with a Twist by David Kamau

Alternative lifestyle can be defined as a mode of living or doing something in a way that is not within the accepted norms or values. Adult alternative lifestyle is simply an unusual sexual lifestyle.

Some activities considered adult alternative lifestyles include:

1. BDSM: This stands for Bondage and Discipline (B&D;), Domination and Submission (D&S;), and Sado-Masochism (S&M;). As the definition suggests, BDSM involves bondage, that is restraining or being restrained, domination as well as submission, Sadism (taking pleasure in inflicting pain on another person) and masochism (taking pleasure in being subjected to a certain degree of pain).

2. Swinging: This can be defined as a form of recreational social and sexual activity between consenting adults whereby partner swapping is acceptable. Swinging is also referred to as "wife swapping", but this definition is inaccurate as it narrows down the activity and makes it look like a male domain. "Partner swapping" may be a simpler but more accurate description.

3. Sexual Fetishism: The arousal and/or gratification through some object, or non-genital part of the body. Such object or body part is referred to as the fetish. Fetishes include but are not limited to shoes (boots or high-hills), feet or digits of the foot, hair, underclothes or lingerie, body piercing, clothing (size, garment-type or size), stockings, etc.

4. Polyamory: This is the practice of having more than one intimate relationship at a time, with the full knowledge and consent of everyone involved. In polyamory there is no partner swapping, as opposed to swinging where swapping is the norm. Polyamorous relationships are usually serious and long term.

Why do people pursue adult alternative lifestyles and relationships? The answers are as many as the individuals. But one that tends to go across the board is- you guessed it- fun. Another reason is fulfillment of sexual fantasies.

There are many more forms and variations of sexual alternative lifestyles than can fit in this article, as well as sub-groupings of the same. For example, Bondage as in the B in BDSM can be considered as a lifestyle on its own.

It is not uncommon for alternative lifestyles to overlap. For example, at a swinger's party (an alternative lifestyle), one person may be getting a body part pierced (a fetish), a man may be receiving a spanking while restrained in chains (BDSM) from a woman in leather garments and boots (dress or shoe fetish), while a polyamorous trio (an alternative lifestyle) may be joined by another couple for a sexual activity.

Thinking of exploring your alternative, fantasy or fetish? There are dating sites specifically dedicated to adult alternative lifestyle, where people of like interests get to meet.

About the Author
David Kamau offers objective online dating site reviews ( at his site. Now discover internet's top rated dating sites for alternative lifestyle personals ( by visiting

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